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Monday, 18 November 2013

Dreams... The kind behind the walls of sleep...

We all dream, we dream we file away memories and we place our days into compartments in our heads, we go through the darkness in our dreams, we go through the light, we are brought back to happier times and sadder times through the dreams we relive while we sleep at night.

I don't dream often, but when I do I recall all of the dream.
My dreams often lead to things to come in my life, never understood why but if I have dreamed it then it nearly always happens. I get random memories the same things pop up that haven't happened and I describe things to come long before they happen.

Yet they are dreams, so they are memories of days that have been and things my head is sorting. So they could be nothing more than Dejavu.

So predicting that I would die before I was 17. Did that nearly a year before I died!
Saying my best friend was pregnant with twins before she knew.
These are just two of the things I saw well in advance that came to pass.

But then there are things which never feel right, when my time line changes from what I have dreamed things feel wrong, at present things feel wrong, have done for a while yet they are going as I dreamed.

Which once more is just confusing, if I knew this is how things were going to go why the hell am I such a mess? I should just be following the path as I have been doing for so long.

Yet there is the thing the one thing I need to change in my life I can't see changing. Which is the job, it has to change, I have to escape where I am to move forward with my life and I just can't seem to find a job, I keep applying but no one is getting back to me, and the few that do are sorry you have not been successful this time. I have never dreamed of a different job. An this is what makes me wonder if I ever will find a new job. Now I know they are dreams and have no relevance to anything surely?

Any way rolling back to dreams. My dreams for once last night were not the nightmares I have been having of late, which makes me think that I have finally settled. My dreams last night were of waking up on different mornings throughout the years that have just gone.

Everyone was wake up, look at the duvet and the clock go oh and roll back over to sleep once more, wake up again, differen duvet different clock and so on, my head was tagging the dates as I went through this as well. It has been a few years worth of waking up to boot. Things around had changed, so started without the TV in the window and without the curtains. Wasn't always alone either. So my dreams showed me my past, and ended with that smile I came to love being there to before finally waking up in the here and now 5 minutes before my alarm went off.

I have no idea what it means, I have no idea where I am going or what is happening at present.
All I know is that is will eventually work out in the end.